Utils in Bat Country

One Week

Until I'm at the shore

(thought not wearing a fabulous frock)

staying at the same house we come back to year after year

(though it does not have a patio like this)

and eating enough delicious food that by the end of the week, I'll likely resemble this

(yep, pretty much)

And I cannot wait.

*all images via Pinterest

Wild Blue Yonder

(I know, I know, Blue Angels aren't Air Force)

The Angels were at the air show and on Saturday night, there was an air crew dinner and a presentation.  They gave a plaque to the museum, the air show gave a plaque with the volunteer signatures on it for them to take back to Pensacola (my name's in BA HQ!). During the presentation, S and I were standing off to the side and my eyes were wandering around the room and I noticed some of the BA crew standing right in front of me.  People were moving all around and taking pictures of the back of them while the speeches were going on and while I didn't get up and position them or anything, I did snap a quick iphone pic

After the presentation, everyone was milling around and people were glued to the BA sides.  I was chatting with some others but inwardly cringing at how people were acting around them.  I mean, fawning and hanging on and asking them to sign the shirts people were wearing and my internal cause no disturbance and bother no one meter was hyperventilating.  I wanted to meet them though, I mean, with my family's background in aviation it was practically law that I had to else risk expulsion from Thanksgiving dinner.

I hovered and waited till I saw one off on his own and after someone walked away, I walked over and tapped him on the shoulder and when he turned around I just kind of squeaked out 'can I just shake your hand?'

I KNOW OMG BIGGEST NERD EVER

Of course he said sure and he shook my (trembling, sweaty) hand and I said thank you and moved to walk away and he was all wait, what's your name, what do you do here and my very first thought was damn, your PR skills are amazing.  Forget about the whole 18 inches, no g-suit thing, pish.

So I said Stephanie and babbled something about Dad and Pop and my uncles and cousins and how they were all going to be jealous of me (they so are) and then I realized I was veering perilously close to giggling so I wrapped it up and told him to have a safe trip back.

Of all the random celebrity encounters I've had over the course of life, my top two are shaking Neil Armstrong's hand and now this.

(Did I get his name?  Of course not.  I'm pretty sure it was #3 though based on what S said.)

And I knew there was no way I could pull off asking for a picture without looking and feeling like a complete prat so I just snapped one of the group from across the room.

Test Driving: Air Show Style

In addition to tooling around on my golf cart, part of my group's tasks during the air show is to corral all the crews rental cars.  Usually, we do this after the show, when all the crowds have left and just look for solitary cars in the lots and click at them with various fobs until we hit on a winner.

This pleases me as one with idiotic parking issues. Also as one with the hopefully more common this is a big ass vehicle I've never driven before, please don't let me run over the people wandering hither and yon throughout the grounds issue.

Friday night, there were a couple of planes coming in late and we decided to just bring their cars out to them on the ramp.  Thankfully I got to follow S and K else I would have likely driven straight into a plane as their aren't any floodlights so the ramp was pitch black by 11pm.  The cars were new Chargers and I have to say, pretty darn spiffy.

[Tangent: I am not a fan of this whole key less just keep it in your pocket technology.  If I ever have a car with this I am going to lose my keys every day.  Dislike! Dislike muchly! I was so paranoid about losing them or locking them in the car while it was running that I drove holding the key in my hand.  Not quite what the auto makers had in mind, I'm guessing.]

So off we go through the grass (off-roading!), through the gates, and out onto the ramp towards the flashing lights of the newly landed planes.  As it was a rental car (with one whole mile on it), the seat was all the way back but as my colleagues were taking off, I didn't have a chance to adjust the seat.  And I wasn't sure if it was possible to do while the car was in motion so my 5'3 self is driving through the night, perched on the very edge of the seat with one toe hanging onto the gas pedal.  Make it out to the pilots, get out of the car (leaving the door open, key firmly in hand) and handle the transfer paperwork by light of cellphone.

Air show after dark!

I thought that would be all my driving related excitement but oh no.  For ease of corralling, when crews came in on Sunday we tried to snag them to see where the cars were parked and bring them in as they came back.  So now, in addition to navigating the cars through the grounds, am also trying to get them out of the maze of parked cars just to get to the dirt road that leads to the gates.  I managed to go 12+ years in TX without ever driving a truck and on Sunday, I found myself face to face with a huge pickup.  But I triumphed! Nothing was hit! I didn't lose the key!

And there was a certain thrill to driving around the air field.

Some of the many I drove.  And now I've saved myself additional car shopping time. The new Chargers and Altimas - quite nice indeed.  Was surprisingly meh on the Civic.  You are welcome fellow car shoppers.

Strike a Chord

Another musical play on words? Must be time for Eharm musings!

Has been kind of a pain in the ass week as far as new matches go.  I look at my matches each morning, archive a couple, leave others in the inbox, and send questions to the remaining few. Generally, what happens next is the ones I sent questions to archive me (hatehatestabbystabbyhate), the ones I would probably archive but left alone send me questions and the rest float along in the lake of no decision making that is my match inbox.

There were a couple of people that I've let languish after receiving the answers to my questions.  Cute as you may be, random bald guy with glasses, when you respond to my questions with you eat to have fuel to run and wander off talking about how we have a President who hasn't ever been to Canada when the question was how much personal space do you need in a relationship, I think I won't be sending you my must haves and can't stands.  Course, I haven't archived him so there he sits, with the orange circle of move on to step 2 mocking me when I log in.

I had moved on to the email stage with two fellows: the player and the butterfly man.

Of course, the one I'm most interested in is the player who hasn't emailed me back since Thursday (even though he sent the first volley in the exchange and contrary to my ramblings here, I can be damn charming when I set my mind to it).  I could always follow up with him, it is allowed. Then it becomes an issue of should I even want to (I admit it, he's hot, I do) but if wanted to continue contact with me, then he would be so I should just let it wither away... or do I take an active role? Or would what I tell myself is taking an active role be more like taking a desperate one? Tell me Internet! To email or not to email?

Then butterfly man has to go and get all difficult.  We had moved on to emailing from our personal accounts and he seemed nice enough, if a bit odd.  I had told him on Thursday that I'd be busy with the air show and MIA till Monday.  He wrote back and said have a nice weekend you're super fabulous etc etc.  I emailed him yesterday and no response.  Hey now. This is not how it's supposed to work. You can't switch from being all persistent and heyheyheyheyHEY and now just be all pfft whatever, maybe I'll email you, maybe I won't.  Brain does not compute!

Then there's Mr. Nudge. Got matched a couple weeks ago, went through the question stage and I looked at his pictures and decided to let him wither.  (He used to be in the military and the pictures from that time look nice and the pictures from now that he put up are...not as).  A few days ago he 'nudged' me, so I sent step 2 must haves and can't stands and he's decided to leapfrog the rest and move straight to email.  Gave me his facebook name and cell number so we can chat or I can just email him back via EH.  So I'll email him back, I suppose.

Was talking about it with R at the air show who has done the whole online thing and she was all you just have to do it and meet people and that's the only way to know and I hate that.  I'm terrible at dating for one and while it's easy enough to mask indifference or not that into it ness over email, is less easy in person.

Overall, a big whatever of a week.  I'll just have to console myself with dreaming of flight suits....

I'm just a bucket full of wonderful

Over the weekend I volunteered at the local air show.  This is my 5th year, I believe and I actually got into it thanks to my charming co-author as it is hosted by the museum she used to work at.  While her presence is missed, the planes and the golf carts and the pilots generally mean a fun weekend is in store.

Yesterday evening, I was making one of my final runs out on the ramp, taking a couple of the helicopter pilots out to get their bags and we were chatting as everyone does: where they were from, what I do when not at the air show, how their flight in was, I must be tired after the whole weekend.  I was chipper to begin with and enjoying my time spent not looking at numbers on a computer screen and by the end of the weekend we all get a bit slap happy so I was all 'nope, not tired, am just having so much fun weeeeeeee'.  And Captain Adorable looks over and says you're just the most cheery person ever, aren't you?

I should have said: Three days of chatting up hot pilots in uniform? Bet your ass I'm cheery.

I actually babbled something about my family being in aviation and it being a good show and enjoying the weekend off.

Alas. I totally could have flirted my way into the cockpit.  Maybe next year...

Book Reviews

A Night of Scandal - Sarah Morgan B

Seems to be the start of the series, a somewhat ridiculous plot but fascinating hero character. Interested enough to read the following books in the series. Heroine was a bit annoying.  Oh, woe, you're a movie star you can't possibly find me attractive because of my thighs, don't look at me with the lights on, oh wait now I'm being kissed and I can't remember anything until the next morning when I get self conscious again.  She has her reasons and while it's throughout the book it isn't so prevalent as to significantly lessen my enjoyment.

Fire Lord's Love - Kathryne Kennedy B+

Another start of a series, really interesting world. Some tweaks to the standard tropes (heroine is trained assassin) and enough mystical quirks to keep me flipping pages.

Wish You Were Here - Phillipa Ashley B+

Short and sweet. Contemporary with a good setting, some funny moments.

The Frog Prince - Elle Lothlorien A-

I enjoyed this a lot more than I thought I would. Annoying subplot near the end that sets up the final conflict but that's my only real quibble

SEALed with a Kiss - Jill Monroe B-

Second in a series, enjoyable, good s*x scenes, doesn't really hold up a re-read though

Easily Amused - Karen McQuestion B

Cute plot, fun read

Yours to Keep - Shannon Stacey A-

Likely my favorite new author. Some of the plot descriptions gave me the initial impression that I'd not like the books but job well done.

Me Against the Machine

Over the weekend, I was wandering through a store and came across some undies that were clearanced out to 3/$9.99.  Pretty good as they were originally $20+/pair.  I found three I liked, made sure each had the black x on the tag denoting their clearance status and headed up to checkout.

The saleswoman rang them up and two rang up properly and the third rang up at $7.50 so she told me my total was $18.  Actually, no.  So I showed her that they were supposed to be the sale price and she tried to ring them up again.  Same thing happened.  She called an employee from lingerie and thought she had figured it out.  Rang them up again, price adjusted the third and made them all ring up at $3.99.  Close but still not there.  I was tempted to just suck up the extra few dollars but had visions of my aunt in my heading saying why would you pay more than you're supposed to so I pressed on.  Said that ringing up at $4/pair did not equal 3 for $10.  She called the other girl up from lingerie and the girl looked at them, saw how they were ringing up and said it must have been an oversight in entering the one price into the computer, adjust her total to $10.  The original employee didn't quite get the adjust the total part so she starts taking down the misbehaving pair of underwear $1 at a time.  She stops midway through that and says no, I can't do that, I'll have to make the last pair less than $2.  I'm still standing there, unperturbed, just not willing to pay more than I'm supposed to.  The girl from lingerie is getting irritated and keeps telling her to just adjust the total.  I finally pipe up and say that if it's 3/$9.99, she could just make each pair $3.33 and that would solve the problems.  She doesn't want to do that and finally the lingerie girl leaned over the counter and was jabbing at the screen showing her how to adjust the total.  She entered $9.99 in the total section of the screen and then my total to pay showed up as $9.60.  How, I do not know.  Now.  $9.99 plus sales tax should have made my total around $10.60.  I was looking at the computer screen trying to figure out what had happened when the employee threw her hands up, said 'close enough', and shot me a look of doom.  So then I figured I'd just keep my mouth shut.

Rather trivial yes but it was amazing to me later how dependent on the computer she was (and we all are).  Even though she could see the promotion, she had another employee telling her what the correct price should be, she still kept saying but the computer says it's X.  Yes, but the computer can be wrong sometimes, especially if there's an oversight in price entering as the other employee stated.

I fought the computer and I won!

And now I own contraband undies.

Musical Chairs

(I wonder how many plays on harmony I'll be able to get out of this whole thing)

Another week, another roundup of Eharm goings on.  It's still a weird thing for me to wrap my head around.  I had lunch with M&C over the weekend and was trying to explain it a bit to them.  It's like both sides of my brain have to mesh together.  On the one hand, it's very pragmatic and direct.  See the picture, read the blurb, yes/no, next.  You have to make a determination about a person based on little information and there isn't really opportunity to dwell on it as the next day, half a dozen new matches come in (at least so far. My matches didn't show up till later this morning and I was driving to work thinking how could I have possibly exhausted the Eharm database in two weeks.  Tis hopeless! Oh.)  On the other hand, much like in real life I suppose, the decision making in large part depends on emotional response.  The initial reaction I get from the pictures - positive or negative - generally dictates what I do next.  Does the text in the profile make me laugh or roll my eyes? (One guy listed his occupation as cat herder and I wished EH was more like FB so I could 'like' it)

It's also perfect from bringing up all those long fought down dormant middle school emotions.  One guy sent me questions and I looked at the profile and decided not for me so I closed the match.  Felt like a right asshole doing it too.  Next morning, one of the people I had sent questions to had closed me.  Now there's a fun feeling.  Because I end up feeling like a heel either way, I've adopted the la la la don't see you approach and just let people languish in my inbox.  Then I go in and organize people in one swoop.  Feels more like data that way, less like actually getting involved.  And I know I'm not the only one, at least half the questions I've sent to people over the last two weeks are still sitting with a 'waiting for his response' notification.

It's odd too from a physical part of it.  As has been detailed in these here pages, I've lost 58 pounds since late 2008.  Yay me and all that.  But when it comes the profiles of guys who are less than svelte I'm not really interested in starting the conversation.  Which I feel weird and snotty and short-sighted about.  In real life I know plenty of non body builders that I think are physically attractive so it goes back to that weird disconnect of making decisions based on reaction to a picture without any real knowledge of personality coming into play.  And it isn't like I'm a waif myself.  I'm much more pleased with how I look, even voluntarily put two pictures of me in bathing suits in my profile (though the hindparts have been conveniently cropped) but I'm not done and I know I'm not the fittest I can be and I'd think the guys on the other side of the screen would see past the ass and think I'm just the most charming and hilarious girl ever given my profile but then I'm not really doing the same thing and it isn't wrong per se to be attracted to who I'm attracted to and yet... I don't know.  That one makes even less sense than the rest of my ramblings but it's like some sort of half-hearted battle between who I'm attracted to and various family member's voices in my head all you're so gorgeous and the part of me that looks in the mirror at my thighs or the tall, blond walking down the street and feeling like I'm in the wrong part of a Venn diagram.  The attractiveness level of the ones I'm pursuing aren't overlapping with my level of attractiveness and so won't be any overlap.  Will just be day after day of running backwards.

True as it may be, I really want to smack myself after that last paragraph so interlude for hilarity!

I've gotten to the point of actually corresponding with a couple of people.  Hooray for no multiple choice.  I predict a Vegas elopement before the leaves turn!  And I wish, I wish, I wish I could post some of the exchanges here because GOOD LORD.  Am trying to cut them some slack because a) am thinking it's harder for guys to do this whole thing with a level of skill than girls b) one is really cute c) I can't deal with the whole rejecting them part of it because all of middle school was essentially me being rejected and d) it's two out of dozens soooo.  They also sent me questions I had to respond to so I spent a good part of yesterday trying to come up with 10 interesting facts about myself.  The way this guy phrased it though, I can't figure out if he's a giant prig or what.  I mean, I use ridiculous words in both my writing and in every day conversation and to my mind, I don't come across like a conceited priss but man.  The way the question was worded was 'tell me 10 facts about you that I might find interesting' and I don't know why but it grates at me.  The way it was phrased made it seem like it was some sort of admissions test and I had to prove my worthiness to move onto the email portion of the whole thing.  But I seem to have passed (#2 - 15 years after my last dance class, I can still bust out a mean pirouette) as he wrote me back this morning.

Onward I go.  If things continue as they are I suppose I'll get to the point of chatting with one of both by phone or in person and the test will be how often I have to repress an eyeroll.

 

Oh, Harry

I hadn't originally planned to go see HP 7.2 at midnight (my level of fandom is only that high for the books) but when my neighbor called and said the theater was showing 7.1 at 9pm followed by 7.2 at midnight, I couldn't resist.

We got to the theater about 8:15 and it was already a madhouse.  15 screens showing the film at midnight and all sold out.  We waited in one line to get our tickets scanned (another to get pretzel bites, Coke, and M&Ms), and then had to go around a rope and get our super fancy 3D glasses AND wristbands.  It was like backstage at a Stones concert. 

We made friends with the people around us, marveled over some of the costumes (I so want Hogwarts robes.  Really, really don't need them) and settled in for 7.1.  Both installments of 7 are the only ones I've seen without recently reading the book and I'm not sure if that's good or bad.  On the one hand, it's good when there are egregious, terrible, unforgivable film choices made that ruin the movie for me (I'm looking at you HP6) but on the other it's irksome when I can't remember why something on screen is happening is more important than the film makes it out to be but the details are just fuzzy enough that...can't remember.

It was good to see 7.1 in the theater with another like minded person and discuss if the benefits of living in the magical world (Hermione's expanding bag) outweighed the negatives (Dementors) and all the tension was ratcheted up enough that it made all the 7.2 payoff that much better.

As far as 7.2 goes.... I enjoyed it.  It felt choppy the whole way through, which I understood.  So much to get through but it nearly seemed more like a bunch of vignettes than a flowing story.

And this is a gripe I have from the books [SPOILER ANYWAY] but I always wanted Neville (who is HOT now) to be the one who finished off Bellatrix. Sure Molly's line is awesome but it always seemed to me that the decision was more of this character who has been a strong presence in the books needs a big triumph more than anything else.

My strongest quibble with a choice made in the movie [VAGUE, NOT REALLY A SPOILER BUT STILL SPOILER] was with McGonagall.  I mentioned it on Zoots blog earlier but she does something and then giggles that she's always wanted to do it.  I don't take issue with the line but the line delivery.  To me, the true McGonagall would have delivered it with a damn right, bet your ass I did it tone rather than sliding into giggly schoolgirl lookee me I just made a birdy out of a teacup territory.

But I'm happy.  And sad.  And bereft (don't go Harry!). And insistent (you owe it to the world to write more JK!).

All things that make for a fantastic experience.

On hangovers

Not that I am currently going through what could be a life-altering hangover. But if I were, here are the ways I would know it.

 

1) If you wake up sometime in the morning (although not sure when, as your clock died weeks ago, which has nothing to do with the hangover and everything to do with the fact that you need to go to the store today, which in turn has EVERYTHING to do with your hangover), and your poor dogs are begging to go outside and get fed, and all you can do is vaguely kick them aside, go to the bathroom, and then crawl unsteadily back into bed.

2) Your roommate feels it necessary to yell from the hallway, "Hey Tassie! Are you alive?"

2a) Because, come to find out, it's 2 in the afternoon and you're still asleep.

2b) No wonder the dogs were unhappy with me.

3) Your roommate laughs and tells you about That Picture of you from the night before. The one with her boyfriend, that many many people on facebook already 'like' and which she is not angry about (one would hope not, as she took it) but instead is jealous of.

3a) You look at the picture, and are unsurprised people find it amusing, as you are wearing rainbow striped thigh highs, heels, jean shorts, and snuggling with your roommate's boyfriend, and really all you see in the picture are legs.

[Steph here using magical admin powers to say that the part of the picture, which is, in fact, amazing that made me cock my head, laugh and let out a 'damn, Tass' wasn't the rainbow stockings, or the jean shorts, or the violet hair, but the heels. This says so very much about both me and Tass :)]

4) You have a vague recollection of blasting Lionel Richie on the record player very very late at night.

5) You finally let the dogs outside, and have to ask your roommate why on earth there's a wine bottle stopper on your back porch.

6) You are every so very thankful that you had some idea where the Advil was.

7) The sound of the clacking on the computer keyboard makes you slightly nauseous.

 

Not that I'm going through any of that right now. But you know. That's how you WOULD know you were hungover.