As has been established many a time, when I'm caught off guard or feel out of control, things tend to not work so well for me.
Naturally, wedding planning has been an adventure. I hate interviewing vendors, figuring out who to go with, trying to negotiate packages, the whole bit. I end up liking people and establishing pseudo Italian friendship bonds and then I feel like I'm deliberately hurting people's feelings if things don't work out even though I rationally get that they understand and don't take it personally.
And because my universe is one all encompassing swirl of ridiculous, choosing a photographer has been especially epic.
I did some research, found a few photographers and sent out inquiries. Had some phone conversations and honed in on one that was great. Super fun on the phone, amazing pictures, and of course, super expensive. Had been upfront that was going to wait a bit while the venue was finalized and then get everything booked. While we were getting all that sorted out (nothing like a technical glitch that prevents email from getting through from them for a month) we did what we do best: continue to analyze and basically spin our wheels. I couldn't stay away from the SMP preferred vendor page and came upon another photograper's site that looked just as amazing. Had all sorts of accolades and the wedding locations featured were of the Four Seasons variety so I was hesitant to event inquire since spending upwards of $10k on pictures is not an option. Figured couldn't hurt and got all the information, had a phone conversation and ended up unable to choose between the two. Both fun on the phone, equal cost, similar photography style, the whole bit.
Had told both that was waiting to finalize the venue and that we'd sort it out because I am not good at the ok we'll let you know spiel. And, it would be great to work with both. And yet, thus began a multi week still haven't heard from the venue, this is the package we want dance. Polled family members who are photographers, colleagues who are artists, random people on the street, and the vote was evenly split. Was going crazy having it unresolved, felt guilty for dragging it out, frustrated with the venue when we didn't know they had an email glitch and just hadn't received any response and so on. Was standing at work, with each of the photographer's sites on my monitors, scrolling in vain, essentially about to flip a coin.
And then! One of the photographer's had a post up from an award he got and there was a picture of him with a group including his wife. And in the caption, I suddenly recognize a name. Turns out, photographer number 2 is married to photographer number 1.
Horror slowly dawned when I remembered that J and I had asked to talk to each of them on a Sunday when I was hoping he would have a tie breaking vote and talked to one at 230 and the other at 3. Wouldn't be a problem except it was Sunday and she mentioned she was out with her husband running errands. Hang up with her and 10 minutes later call him. Asked if it was still a fine time to talk and he said sure, he was just in the car going around town.
I WONDER WHO WAS IN THE CAR WITH HIM.
On that particular day, neither of them let on that they knew so I'm not sure when they found out we were talking to both of them but after I saw the picture and realized what had happened I spent a couple of minutes trying to sort out the logistics of running away to Tahiti. When that didn't pan out, figured the best thing to do was embrace the insanity. I emailed them and basically said so, obviously we all appreciate good photography, we like you both and are going to flip a coin so whatever you two want to do works for us. Ok, byeeee.
Good times then at 6:02 tonight when my phone rings and he's all so, yeah. I immediately start stammering and laughing and pacing around the bedroom and generally sounding like a utter buffoon. Explained that I found one, J found the other (what is wrong with me) and that with all the venue stasis we just kept going back and forth and since we were unable to make a decision, wanted to get their input that way if one wanted to shoot the wedding more than the other, we'd take that into account. He was all, uh, so, that's not how it works, you actually have to decide. I managed to stop myself from begging them to not make me do it and said, ok, well just so you know, if you really have no preference, I'm assigning you each a number and using the random function in excel and letting the wizards of math decide.
So, both of the photographers now know I'm a nutter and likely think I'm an imbecile and I still have to make a decision.
Maybe I can get the cats to choose.